Sept. 15 - Oct. 17 Updates
Hi everyone,
09/15/06: I sent the District Attorney photographs of Tina that my brother took at Cedars-Sinai the first few days after the accident. He also took photos at 3 1/2 months and it is quite evident that Tina's condition had not gotten much better. I wrote a letter stating that to the DA Tina was just a name and that I felt she needed to see the impact of Tina's injuries.
The DA is a restitution specialist and I tallied up all Tina's bills that I received until that date and it is staggering. For 10 days at Cedars-Sinai the bills came to $719,000 and Kaiser paid $509,000. Approx. $17,500 was denied (I still need to check on or re-submit these but I'm not in the mood). (Ok, you can close your mouth now.) I've never been a Kaiser member, but I haven't received any Kaiser bills, so I guess they don't bill. If that is the case, then all the the above figures don't even include her month stay in ICU at Kaiser!!
Her stay at the long term nursing facility was quoted to me for private pay at $328.00 per day, this does not include medications and ancillary services. So for 30 days it is $9,840.00 for private pay room & board only.
09/17/06: I went over the Power of Attorney and the Advanced Health Care Directive with Tina. The Advanced Health Care Directive is the best way to make sure that your health care wishes are known and considered if for any reason you are unable to speak for yourself. You may appoint another person to be your health care "agent." Second, you may write down your health care wishes in the Advance Health Care Directive form—for example, a desire not to receive treatment that only prolongs the dying process if you are terminally ill. Your doctor and your agent must follow your lawful instructions. http://www.cmanet.org/publicdoc.cfm/7
When I went over the form with Tina, I was really happy that she choose to have all means to keep her alive, I cried and thanked her. Some of you who haven't seen her think she is in a coma or vegetative state. She is not - she is fully there, even with her sense of humor she is still Tina.
I've applied for Victim's Assistance for Tina, a state agency that helps to pay costs after all other avenues have been exhausted.
Thur 10/05/06 I had been off on vacation the week before and this week also. All I did was work on Tina's business. I would work a little then I'd need to take a break - it is hard working with all the details of her life and the emotions involved. I worked on her accounting, applying for Social Security for Tina, applying for Long-Term Care Medi-Cal (what a pain in the ass form). Filling out all these forms, especially Social Security, I had to relive the whole ordeal. My right hand was shaking after I filled out that form. The woman at Social Security, after our 2.5 hour meeting said, "I need a nap." That is what I feel, I can only take on chunks at a time. I had meetings and many phone calls to and from Kaiser, COBRA, and Country Villa hospital staff. Today I even broke down and cried on the phone when someone asked me for one more form!!!! There are so many details. What happens of someone doesn't have anyone to do all the paperwork? Everyone has been very nice, but it is like I'm the first person to go through this, no one knows what to do first, so in a way there is a lot of run around with "the system". The facility where she's at told me that now that I've applied for Medi-Cal that the facility will bill Medi-Cal $13,500.00 per month!
This afternoon after a very trying week I received a call from Kate Adamson. She had had a stroke and had the same thing Tina has been diagnosed with, "Locked In Syndrome", they can feel but they can't move. I had ordered Kate's book called "Kate's Journey" (www.katesjourney.com) the week before and there was a box to request an autograph with inscription - so I wrote about Tina's situation. Kate has overcome the Locked In Syndrome, but still is paralyzed in her left arm, and partial use of her left leg, but she is now an inspirational speaker, who lives in Redondo Beach. Kate called me and said she had been out of town on a speaking engagement, she asked about Tina and said she wants to visit Tina when she returns in 3 weeks from a speaking tour. I wanted to cry. Here is someone who knows what we are going thru, but more important she knows what Tina is going thru! I'm reading the book to Tina and there are so many similarities and in some cases Kate had more problems with medical staff than we have had. There are times when Tina cries as I'm reading, but I still think it is healing for her and there are times when I can't read anymore because I'm crying so much. The Respiratory Tech said when Kate visits they will put Tina in this "Geri chair" and move her into the living room.
Tina is put in the Geri Chair 2 or 3 times per week and they have entertainment at the facility. That is if she wants to - sometimes she is so stubborn and doesn't want to leave her room. She is doing much better without the cervical collar. She moves her head and neck more. The other day she spelled "My leg." So I thought she was in pain, then she spelled, "Look" and she move it a little. I tell you this slight movement can make me so happy.
Sat 10/07/06 My daughter Jessie came down from San Francisco. You can see Tina's heart go to mush when she sees my kids - she loves them so much. I introduced Tina's favorite nurse, Sheila to my daughters Jessie and Lisa. Sheila made a comment about the two sets of sisters and Tina slowly spelled out to me (I go through the alphabet and she blinks yes on each letter) "I'm the pretty one." Here we are thinking that she needs something but she is being a wisecracker. She just cracked us up.
When I say Tina spells out - I mean that I go through the alphabet and Tina blinks yes on the correct letter. It is time consuming and makes me dizzy. Sometimes people bring in a paper with the whole alphabet thinking that it will help me, but they should try it everyday - that would make me dizzy too, looking back and forth at the paper and to see her response, so my way works pretty good.
Mon 10/09/06 Tina spelled out to me "throat valve". It is called a Passi-Muir Valve. The Respiratory Supervisor said they put it in at 2:00 and that it would be in until 6:00. Tina mouthed, "oh no." and made us laugh, she wasn't laughing, it was uncomfortabe. He said she is supposed to practice the vowels and yes and no. She was so exhausted when I came into the room and he said that it was because she was using her vocal chords. I asked what she would sound like and he said, her voice would sound normal but right now it is a very small whisper. It makes her cough, but that is good. I cried a little, I haven't heard her voice in almost 5 months! I read the book,"Kate's Journey" to her and we both cried, and I massaged her and then I told her that we should practice her speaking. It was so exciting to hear even that little squeak of a whisper. So I had her do the vowels, then yes and no a few times and then I said some cuss words and she repeated, like a bad little girl and we started cracking up, I practically fell down on the bed laughing so hard and the nurses came running up because they thought I was crying. So they even got in on the laughing. It was an emotional visit from one end of the spectrum to the other.
One of the attorney's told me to keep track of my time, good thing I had kind of already started it and had a lot of good notes. As of 10/13/06 I've spent the equivalent of 36 eight hour days since the accident. Seeing things in black and white makes me realize why I'm so damn tired, why I don't want to think anymore, I don't want to fill out any more forms, etc.
I am asking for her friends to please continue visiting. Some people have stopped coming. I know people are busy, but if you can spare some time it really helps me out. I visited her everyday for 2 months straight and sometimes if I know people are going to visit, I can take a break. So, if you do go, if you can let me know, email is always good, (cell: 562.400.0021) I'd appreciate it and please sign the log that is on the wall.
The address again is: Country Villa, 1730 Grand Ave., LB Room 7C (go to the right wing)
Remember, we have a blog: www.everybodylovestina.blogspot.com in case anyone wants to post a message.
Little by little I'm meeting Tina's friends and one by one, people who are on someone's email list, who don't know me nor Tina who are praying for her. It really touches my heart.
Some people ask me how I can keep up with all this stuff or talk like I'm some kind of hero, but I'm just doing what I have to do and I can't give up. If I was in her situation I would really be bored as hell and would appreciate visitors. Tina is so very appreciative of all that I do.
It is really hard trying to get caught up to speed on someone else's life and trying to take care of my own life, and my own businesses, plumbing problems, car problems,cell problems, etc. it can be overwhelming at times with no end in sight. My life is so extreme, in the past few months my hula business has been booming and I even have a website: http://partypop.com/Vendors/4109107.htm (shameless promotion). I'm going through all this serious heavy duty stuff with Tina and on the other end I'm doing all these parties and I'm center of attention. I guess it is good for me, so that I'm taken out of the mundane everyday business. I just finished a piece (book/play not sure) I was writing that I told Tina it was dedicated to her. When I told her I finished, after working on it for a year, she was very happy.
I've been working with Tina having her close her eyes and visualize her coming home party, the menu, the guest list, places she wants to travel to, clothes she wants to shop for. She spells out colors, textures, etc. I go thru magazines and have her pick things out she likes. When I do this kind of activity and as I leave she is in much higher spirits. It gives her hope.
My friend Diane says that right now, with Tina being unable to speak she is "The Secret Keeper"- so if there is anything you need to get off your chest and confess to somebody, go tell Tina.
The staff say that they've seen patients who receive visitors make the best improvements. I've heard from the nurses that they've seen people worse off than Tina and they have seen wonderful results in cases that were almost hopeless. Please think of her healthy, well and SASSY.
Thank you so much for your healing prayers - despite it all she looks pretty good. Skin condition is good, no bedsores, no pneumonia since she got over it from Kaiser days, urinary tract infections, but they say that happens when people have foley catheters.
10/17/06 This morning Tina and I had a meeting with 2 attorneys. They were really nice and had good stuff to report (I'm choosing not to broadcast) but when they left Tina was uncomfortable and we asked if she wanted pain meds, she kept mouthing stuff but I couldn't understand, I tried to spell things out and she finally spelled out "nothing" - that nothing was wrong with her physically. I asked, "Are you sad". She gave me the evil eye and mouthed "no", then I understood "mad", "I'm mad". She cried and I told her she had every right to cry and be mad as hell, but I have to go to work and I can't stay here with you. I told her I'd put a movie on and she didn't want it, so I put on "Grease" anyway, just in case she felt better later.
Deep, deep, deep down inside me, I fell Tina will recover.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the prayers and good wishes.
With Love from Tina's Big Sis,
Linda
09/15/06: I sent the District Attorney photographs of Tina that my brother took at Cedars-Sinai the first few days after the accident. He also took photos at 3 1/2 months and it is quite evident that Tina's condition had not gotten much better. I wrote a letter stating that to the DA Tina was just a name and that I felt she needed to see the impact of Tina's injuries.
The DA is a restitution specialist and I tallied up all Tina's bills that I received until that date and it is staggering. For 10 days at Cedars-Sinai the bills came to $719,000 and Kaiser paid $509,000. Approx. $17,500 was denied (I still need to check on or re-submit these but I'm not in the mood). (Ok, you can close your mouth now.) I've never been a Kaiser member, but I haven't received any Kaiser bills, so I guess they don't bill. If that is the case, then all the the above figures don't even include her month stay in ICU at Kaiser!!
Her stay at the long term nursing facility was quoted to me for private pay at $328.00 per day, this does not include medications and ancillary services. So for 30 days it is $9,840.00 for private pay room & board only.
09/17/06: I went over the Power of Attorney and the Advanced Health Care Directive with Tina. The Advanced Health Care Directive is the best way to make sure that your health care wishes are known and considered if for any reason you are unable to speak for yourself. You may appoint another person to be your health care "agent." Second, you may write down your health care wishes in the Advance Health Care Directive form—for example, a desire not to receive treatment that only prolongs the dying process if you are terminally ill. Your doctor and your agent must follow your lawful instructions. http://www.cmanet.org/publicdoc.cfm/7
When I went over the form with Tina, I was really happy that she choose to have all means to keep her alive, I cried and thanked her. Some of you who haven't seen her think she is in a coma or vegetative state. She is not - she is fully there, even with her sense of humor she is still Tina.
I've applied for Victim's Assistance for Tina, a state agency that helps to pay costs after all other avenues have been exhausted.
Thur 10/05/06 I had been off on vacation the week before and this week also. All I did was work on Tina's business. I would work a little then I'd need to take a break - it is hard working with all the details of her life and the emotions involved. I worked on her accounting, applying for Social Security for Tina, applying for Long-Term Care Medi-Cal (what a pain in the ass form). Filling out all these forms, especially Social Security, I had to relive the whole ordeal. My right hand was shaking after I filled out that form. The woman at Social Security, after our 2.5 hour meeting said, "I need a nap." That is what I feel, I can only take on chunks at a time. I had meetings and many phone calls to and from Kaiser, COBRA, and Country Villa hospital staff. Today I even broke down and cried on the phone when someone asked me for one more form!!!! There are so many details. What happens of someone doesn't have anyone to do all the paperwork? Everyone has been very nice, but it is like I'm the first person to go through this, no one knows what to do first, so in a way there is a lot of run around with "the system". The facility where she's at told me that now that I've applied for Medi-Cal that the facility will bill Medi-Cal $13,500.00 per month!
This afternoon after a very trying week I received a call from Kate Adamson. She had had a stroke and had the same thing Tina has been diagnosed with, "Locked In Syndrome", they can feel but they can't move. I had ordered Kate's book called "Kate's Journey" (www.katesjourney.com) the week before and there was a box to request an autograph with inscription - so I wrote about Tina's situation. Kate has overcome the Locked In Syndrome, but still is paralyzed in her left arm, and partial use of her left leg, but she is now an inspirational speaker, who lives in Redondo Beach. Kate called me and said she had been out of town on a speaking engagement, she asked about Tina and said she wants to visit Tina when she returns in 3 weeks from a speaking tour. I wanted to cry. Here is someone who knows what we are going thru, but more important she knows what Tina is going thru! I'm reading the book to Tina and there are so many similarities and in some cases Kate had more problems with medical staff than we have had. There are times when Tina cries as I'm reading, but I still think it is healing for her and there are times when I can't read anymore because I'm crying so much. The Respiratory Tech said when Kate visits they will put Tina in this "Geri chair" and move her into the living room.
Tina is put in the Geri Chair 2 or 3 times per week and they have entertainment at the facility. That is if she wants to - sometimes she is so stubborn and doesn't want to leave her room. She is doing much better without the cervical collar. She moves her head and neck more. The other day she spelled "My leg." So I thought she was in pain, then she spelled, "Look" and she move it a little. I tell you this slight movement can make me so happy.
Sat 10/07/06 My daughter Jessie came down from San Francisco. You can see Tina's heart go to mush when she sees my kids - she loves them so much. I introduced Tina's favorite nurse, Sheila to my daughters Jessie and Lisa. Sheila made a comment about the two sets of sisters and Tina slowly spelled out to me (I go through the alphabet and she blinks yes on each letter) "I'm the pretty one." Here we are thinking that she needs something but she is being a wisecracker. She just cracked us up.
When I say Tina spells out - I mean that I go through the alphabet and Tina blinks yes on the correct letter. It is time consuming and makes me dizzy. Sometimes people bring in a paper with the whole alphabet thinking that it will help me, but they should try it everyday - that would make me dizzy too, looking back and forth at the paper and to see her response, so my way works pretty good.
Mon 10/09/06 Tina spelled out to me "throat valve". It is called a Passi-Muir Valve. The Respiratory Supervisor said they put it in at 2:00 and that it would be in until 6:00. Tina mouthed, "oh no." and made us laugh, she wasn't laughing, it was uncomfortabe. He said she is supposed to practice the vowels and yes and no. She was so exhausted when I came into the room and he said that it was because she was using her vocal chords. I asked what she would sound like and he said, her voice would sound normal but right now it is a very small whisper. It makes her cough, but that is good. I cried a little, I haven't heard her voice in almost 5 months! I read the book,"Kate's Journey" to her and we both cried, and I massaged her and then I told her that we should practice her speaking. It was so exciting to hear even that little squeak of a whisper. So I had her do the vowels, then yes and no a few times and then I said some cuss words and she repeated, like a bad little girl and we started cracking up, I practically fell down on the bed laughing so hard and the nurses came running up because they thought I was crying. So they even got in on the laughing. It was an emotional visit from one end of the spectrum to the other.
One of the attorney's told me to keep track of my time, good thing I had kind of already started it and had a lot of good notes. As of 10/13/06 I've spent the equivalent of 36 eight hour days since the accident. Seeing things in black and white makes me realize why I'm so damn tired, why I don't want to think anymore, I don't want to fill out any more forms, etc.
I am asking for her friends to please continue visiting. Some people have stopped coming. I know people are busy, but if you can spare some time it really helps me out. I visited her everyday for 2 months straight and sometimes if I know people are going to visit, I can take a break. So, if you do go, if you can let me know, email is always good, (cell: 562.400.0021) I'd appreciate it and please sign the log that is on the wall.
The address again is: Country Villa, 1730 Grand Ave., LB Room 7C (go to the right wing)
Remember, we have a blog: www.everybodylovestina.blogspot.com in case anyone wants to post a message.
Little by little I'm meeting Tina's friends and one by one, people who are on someone's email list, who don't know me nor Tina who are praying for her. It really touches my heart.
Some people ask me how I can keep up with all this stuff or talk like I'm some kind of hero, but I'm just doing what I have to do and I can't give up. If I was in her situation I would really be bored as hell and would appreciate visitors. Tina is so very appreciative of all that I do.
It is really hard trying to get caught up to speed on someone else's life and trying to take care of my own life, and my own businesses, plumbing problems, car problems,cell problems, etc. it can be overwhelming at times with no end in sight. My life is so extreme, in the past few months my hula business has been booming and I even have a website: http://partypop.com/Vendors/4109107.htm (shameless promotion). I'm going through all this serious heavy duty stuff with Tina and on the other end I'm doing all these parties and I'm center of attention. I guess it is good for me, so that I'm taken out of the mundane everyday business. I just finished a piece (book/play not sure) I was writing that I told Tina it was dedicated to her. When I told her I finished, after working on it for a year, she was very happy.
I've been working with Tina having her close her eyes and visualize her coming home party, the menu, the guest list, places she wants to travel to, clothes she wants to shop for. She spells out colors, textures, etc. I go thru magazines and have her pick things out she likes. When I do this kind of activity and as I leave she is in much higher spirits. It gives her hope.
My friend Diane says that right now, with Tina being unable to speak she is "The Secret Keeper"- so if there is anything you need to get off your chest and confess to somebody, go tell Tina.
The staff say that they've seen patients who receive visitors make the best improvements. I've heard from the nurses that they've seen people worse off than Tina and they have seen wonderful results in cases that were almost hopeless. Please think of her healthy, well and SASSY.
Thank you so much for your healing prayers - despite it all she looks pretty good. Skin condition is good, no bedsores, no pneumonia since she got over it from Kaiser days, urinary tract infections, but they say that happens when people have foley catheters.
10/17/06 This morning Tina and I had a meeting with 2 attorneys. They were really nice and had good stuff to report (I'm choosing not to broadcast) but when they left Tina was uncomfortable and we asked if she wanted pain meds, she kept mouthing stuff but I couldn't understand, I tried to spell things out and she finally spelled out "nothing" - that nothing was wrong with her physically. I asked, "Are you sad". She gave me the evil eye and mouthed "no", then I understood "mad", "I'm mad". She cried and I told her she had every right to cry and be mad as hell, but I have to go to work and I can't stay here with you. I told her I'd put a movie on and she didn't want it, so I put on "Grease" anyway, just in case she felt better later.
Deep, deep, deep down inside me, I fell Tina will recover.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the prayers and good wishes.
With Love from Tina's Big Sis,
Linda
posted by Lisa @ 2:54 PM
